The Most Wonderfulest Time of the Year

Good morning clownsters! With sweater season is almost upon us, I think it is time to give pause and think an awesome and awful truth. Someone was paid to create this and someone paid for the privilege of wearing this. Humbled, I have no words . . .

Either the ultimate birth control or ultimate turn-on because you can't wait to get her out of it. 

From the WTF Files, We Have

Karl Malden reading the speeches of LBJ to a woman in a clown bra . . .

Your argument is soooooo invalid that it will take the light from valid 10,000 years to reach it.

"Bullwhip Griffin." Oh Disney, you hurt me so good!

I'mmmmm Baaaaccckkk . . .

After far too long of a hiatus and an experiment of joining a blog network, the original "Why I Fear Clowns" is back in business. Stop by often and see the creepiest of the creepy clown art, photos, dolls, and figurines. What makes us different is these aren't Halloween costumes that are creepy on purpose. These are clowns that people thought were seriously funny and cute and just wonderful to have around the house. Yeah . . . I know . . . .

Welcome back! We've been waiting for you.

Let Me Hear Your Opinion and Vote . . .

What's in the container? Martinis, I vote for martinis . . .



A generation of children raised by this drunken creep clown. Yet one more way our parents scarred us for life!

Got A Girlfriend You Need To Mess With?

Print this out life-size and tape it the outside of her bedroom window . . .



Unless, of course, she owns firearms. That could be dangerous. Very dangerous.

Existential Crisis Clown . . .

Needs a hug . . .



"An existential crisis is a stage of development at which an individual questions the very foundations of his or her life: whether their life has any meaning, purpose or value."

Message to the painter: "The answer to the above question is NO."

Someone Asked Me . . .

If there were any clown paintings that I like.

The answer is "yes."

This isn't it . . .

The "Ewww" Series Continues . . .

With this creepy entry from (of all people) Norman-freaking-Rockwell!



A creepy clown awkwardly comforts an uncomfortable-looking young runaway.

"Here, here, clown white washes right off. Now, we don't need to tell anyone you were here . . . especially my parole officer."

A Time To Be Thankful . . .

That this freak didn't show up for Thanksgiving dinner,



Unless he is a member of the family, then you have more problems than a blog can solve . . .

San Francisco Has Banned . . .

Putting toys in children's meals that do not meet nutritional guidelines.



Some see this as an assault on the inalienable right to feed your children cwap for lunch. I see it as a step in stopping the infiltration of clowns into society.

This kid understands . . .when she grows up she will vote to ban clowns from fast food restaurants!

Be ever vigilant, clowns are sneaky!

Another Halloween Treasure

Just sort of sums up everything that is wrong with clowns - that magic place where happy and psychotic meet up.

There Are No Words . . .

To describe what is easily the world's strangest sweater! You know it's bad when the clown is the most normal part.

Nobody At The Ad Agency . . .

Could figure out why this new ad campaign wasn't working . . .

"All the kids in the focus group were screaming. That's good isn't it?"



The good old days when having "sugar" in the title was a good thing. Two bowls of this and you felt and acted like this goggle-eyed goon!

I'm Sorry . . .

But, I have to say it . . .

(you can leave now, no harm, no foul . . . )

Okay, you were warned . . .

She's obviously KooKoo for Coco's Stuff!



Yes, those wonderful childhood memories of clowns out behind the Big Top!

Newsflash!

Clown Eats Man <------ Old News



However,

Man Eats Clown . . .

It's Almost Halloween!!

Time for the kids to dress up in scary, creepy costumes!

Time to send in the clowns!

If you open your door to this frantic, over-caffeinated little freak, you have only yourself to blame . . .



Too bubbly for you? Try something a bit more from the Michael Meyer School of Clownination.



Just hand over the candy and I won't be back later with an axe . . . or maybe I will . . . I haven't decided yet . . .

Bozo Gets Bad News . . .

From his bookie . . .



Alright kiddies, who wants to play a game? Go get mommy's checkbook . . .

Just Another . . .

Creepy, awkward photo of clowns posing with tense scared children.

An afternoon at the television show,



A lifetime in therapy . . .

Compare the two photos. Coincidence? I think not!

Bozo and His Minions

Gathered to discuss world clownination . . .



Contact your congressman to pass laws to prohibit clown clots from forming.

Khildren of the Klownz . . .

A young accolyte in the Bozo division of the International Clown Cabal. That grin is unsettling.



I think the parents should be reported to Child Protective Services. That is, if they are not stuffed in a closet somewhere.